Romance At The Local Park

When you’re an old guy like me, bad feet and questionable knees make your choice of exercise regimens rather limited.  And since puttering around in the shop, or sitting at the computer trying to write interesting commentary is not considered legitimate exercise, my choice of physical activity has defaulted to bike riding within a couple miles of my house.

While I could easily go off on a rant about bike riding, I‘ll save that for another time.  I mean, any activity that makes you feel like a buck during hunting season, calls for some sort of exposure as the second deadliest urban exercise after being chased by muggers and/or bill collectors.  But in circling my local park’s vehicle area, I’ve slowly become quite a chronicler of what actually goes on there during daylight hours. And believe it or not, there’s a shocking amount of romance in the air.

For example, it’s a handy haven for horny Middle School students who walk past it on their way home.  Clumped around those more “out of the way” picnic benches, they ardently practice a variety of chasing, catching, and “rubbing up against each other” skills so appealing at that age.  Maybe it’s just normal adolescent behavior, or perhaps a “hands-on” homework assignment for their Human Sexuality class.

Then there are the couples who meet for lunch, arriving in  separate vehicles.  They park at different spots in the lot, then meet at a table somewhere in between.  Once there, some snuggle and smooch while they share sustenance, and others sit separately and pass things across the table.  Whether picnicking or not, my guess is that the snugglers and smoochers are most likely not married, and the ones with the space between them, are.

Another coed “grouping” also arrives in separate cars, but ends up in either one vehicle or the other.  They usually begin by chatting for a few moments, but inevitably move on to more tactile forms of communication which, if happening in colder weather, would certainly fog up every window in short order. 

Of course, there are couples who arrive at the park together, then walk hand-in-hand to areas unknown, glancing back over their shoulders as they go. They always seem to reappear ten to twenty minutes later with new looks of appreciation on their faces, most likely for the bounties provided by nature to those with a strong attraction for each other.

And almost always, there’s at least one couple under a blanket in 80 degree heat, moving in ways that make it clear they must have mistakenly stretched it out over a colony of red ants.  Of course,  they might be practicing wrestling strategies for the 2016 Olympics, even though I’m not aware that “lip locks” are one of the moves that are either legal, or need much practice even if they are. 

Finally, every once and awhile a Senior couple hobbles from their vehicle, pulled by a dust mop of a dog on a long leash.  They usually end up on the closest bench, and while no less romantic than those around them, their expression of love is usually more geriatric than athletic.  A gentle hand on the shoulder, or simple sharing of a small snack among all three, seems to say it all.  And once and awhile they glance at their youthful counterparts, then turn and smile sweetly at each other.  And while I’m still circling on my bike observing from afar, I can almost hear them quietly saying, “Been there, done that!”