A Kid’s View On Dealing With World Bullies

This is not the first time you’ve heard me suggest that kids should be consulted for ideas on how to solve adult problems. After three years of observing President Obama’s impotent approach on dealing with foreign scoundrels and anti-American types, then, it’s clear he would have benefited by asking children for advice on how to handle those who seek to do this country harm.

The President, of course, remains convinced that his ability to deliver silver-tongued oratory and rational bilateral solutions, is the “enlightened” way do the job. But to date it hasn't seemed to be effective, and most kids could have told him that from the start. They understand that when you reason and “schmooze” with a bully weaker than yourself, you’re only adding to his sense of power and impunity. Not only that, you’re buying him additional time to embellish and solidify his next plan to do YOU in.

When I was a young teacher, I remember an incident on the playground which exemplifies what I’m saying. A habitual bully was cruising the yard doing what he did best… annoying and harassing kids around him. Eventually he went up to a boy I knew was not only a good student, but a fine athlete more than capable of physically defending himself. The bully hassled him for awhile, then seemed to got bored when he received only a minimum of attention. So he moved on, drawn to others whose emotional reactions to his presence better inflated his sense of power.

Predictably, the student who had been bothered did what “good” kids are told to do. He followed established protocol and came to me to report the incident. As the “responsible adult,” I advised him to try to solve such incidents with words whenever he could. My next suggestion, (right out of the Teacher‘s Handbook), was for him to simply move to a new play area when words didn't work.

The following day I observed the boy and his friend being bothered by that same bully. I watched as they engaged him in a long and animated discussion. Then, with politically correct form, they turned and walked away to another area of the playground. Of course, as happens with bullies in the real world (especially those who haven’t read the handbook), the pest followed and escalated his harassment even more.

Then something unexpected happened. I guess the two friends could take no more. I saw them deliberately move towards the bully, and push him up against a tree with unmistakable resolve. Only inches from his face, they simply stared him down as they told him something I couldn’t hear. The kid seemed not only totally shocked, but absolutely confused. Then, instead of retaliating as I thought he might, he turned and walked away. The two boys watched his retreat with obvious satisfaction, and gave each other a "high five" as they resumed playing.

Unfortunately, that day’s “show of strength” did not cause the bully to change his ways. The perennial playground punk continued to exploit kids whenever he could. But never again, at least to my knowledge, did he mess with the two boys who had finally stood up to his abuse. He had gotten a small taste of their “power,” and decided to limit his attention to weaker prey.

This incident considered, would most kids advise the administration to deal with hardcore despots such as Hugo Chavez of Venezuela, or Ahmadi-Nejad of Iran by using tactful political rhetoric and being obsessed with not hurting their feelings? Would they suggest continued attempts at appeasement, more fruitless negotiations, or simply bribing them to be our “buddies?” Would they advise the Commander-In-Chief to act weakly, even though we are strong? I think not.

One thing is for sure. Most playground bullies flourish when they are convinced that no one “tougher” than them is willing to step up and challenge their behavior. And they count on that for their success. For, in truth, only a hard-core few really want to get to the point where fighting is their only remaining option. Losing a physical confrontation is their worst nightmare. Such physical defeat not only sullies their reputation as a "bad ass," but exposes them as the blowhards they usually are.

So, kids would warn that dealing with bullies using politically correct verbiage and Pollyannaish reasoning, is almost always a losing strategy. The only way to get them off your back is to summon the courage (and friends, if necessary), to back them into the nearest corner, look them straight in the eye, and whisper the unequivocal words of Clint Eastwood: “Go ahead, Punk… make my day.”