Three Cheers For Duct Tape !!

I don’t want to start a debate here, but in my opinion “duct tape” is one of the greatest things ever invented.  And while it might be simpler in design than the automobile, less flashy than the electric light bulb, and more low tech than today’s electronic gadgets, it nonetheless exceeds almost everything in the number of practical uses it can serve.

Duct tape seems to be the red-headed stepchild of modern creations.  I spent time on-line trying to determine where it placed in the hierarchy of notable inventions, and it didn’t even show up in the top thirty or forty items named.  Frankly, I was shocked.  I mean, it must have some importance if I go through two or three rolls each and every year, and if entire TV shows have been aired with this versatile tape as the “star.”

I must admit, for years I looked down on those who called it “duck” tape, thinking it was just another example of how such unappreciative people further undervalued the product by getting its name wrong.  They made it sound like something one would use to bind the wings and feet of kidnapped waterfowl, or as a gag around the beak of that annoying bird that advertises for Aflac. But research informed me that it was indeed called “duck” tape when it was first invented for use in World War II to keep moisture out of ammo boxes.  Upon learning that, I felt a little less defensive about my silver-gray friend.
 

Let’s face it.  Anything as basic as duct tape that can fill four complete episodes of the Discovery Channel's “MythBusters,” has got to be impressive.  On those shows (listed below), it was used to do everything from lifting a car off the ground, to taping Adam Savage to the ceiling of the workshop.  Other projects included using duct tape to fashion a working sailboat, a  surfboard, a black powder canon that actually fired, a 100 foot bridge across a chasm, and various survival tools such as a temporary shelter, container to store water, and hats and footwear to protect oneself from the elements.

If that wasn’t impressive enough, the MythBusters also replaced the shredded skin of a light aircraft with this versatile product.   Covering gaping holes in its damaged fuselage and tail control sections with rolls of duct tape, they created a new “skin” that, while only meant to be temporary, allowed the plane and pilot to take off safely, and fly at low altitude above the runway.

Now, someone much wiser than me once said this: “If you can’t fix it with duct tape, you haven’t used enough.”  And that about sums it up.  Nothing is stronger, and nothing adheres better to just about anything.  That’s my personal assessment, of course, and like duct tape… I’m sticking to it!

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If you’d like to check out the Mythbuster duct tape shows for yourself, copy and paste the following address into your browser:
http://www.youtube.com  Then type “mythbusters/duct tape” into the search box, and you can easily find these episodes:  “Duct Tape 1,” “Duct Tape 2,” “Duct Tape Plane,” and “Duct Tape Island.”

Gassed By Our Own Government

What would you say if you found out that automobile companies in this country are manufacturing cars that get DOUBLE the gas mileage of any found in the showrooms of American dealerships?  And what would you think if you suddenly realized that these gas-saving vehicles are being shipped and sold to other countries, while being prohibited from sale here in the good old U.S. of A?  And would it be a huge surprise that your own government and a “green” president are the primary “actors” in this political and economic travesty, and not only the greedy oil industry?

This week I got an e-mail with a link to a “You Tube” video (see end of post), that debunks the notion that our government really gives one shit about making the environment cleaner, or reducing our fossil fuel dependence on those abroad who hate our guts.  Visiting in Europe, the man who posted the video found that he was getting over fifty miles per gallon from the Volkswagen Station Wagon he had rented, and in which he and three others were traveling fully packed.  The car’s engine was designed with something called “Blue Motion TDI” technology, and on the Volkswagen UK website, it lists this car as actually getting 72 miles per gallon on the highway, with an average of 69 mpg when factoring in urban driving, as well.

So what’s going on?  Before you think that Europe has smarter car companies than us, consider this.  These fuel efficient cars ARE presently being manufactured here in the United States and being exported to other countries.  And the bottom line as to why Americans are not allowed to buy them, (quoting the video), is “because of economic reasons.”  Here’s a short version of the ugly equation that explains the whole rip-off:  Such fuel efficient cars = less gas purchased = less revenue from gas taxes that the government rakes in to maintain roads and highways.

In short, then, the whole issue of our country becoming “greener” is being driven by something else that’s green… MONEY!  And the feigned concern about the environment by our political leaders, and their self-serving “efforts” to reduce our debilitating dependence on fossil fuel, end up being nothing more than the unadulterated fecal deposits of male cows.

I encourage you to view this informative video for yourself.  I did the research, and the mileage facts the man used are absolutely TRUE.  Once you’ve heard his story, then, if the wave of betrayal that washes over you is not too strong, decide what you can do to make things better… and I don’t mean moving to Europe.  At least share the information with someone else who cares.  And though replacing politicians is usually like adding insult to injury, the upcoming election offers us a small chance to begin the process of getting our country‘s house in order.  No matter your political affiliation, consider throwing out the political “gas bags” that strive mostly to stay in power, and do little to move this country forward on behalf of its citizens.

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To view the video, copy and paste this address into your browser:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uBnlXGvA1Wk&feature=results_main&playnext=1&list=PL424FBEBB212DE778

Where Politicians Look For Solutions

This week I read an issue of “Reader’s Digest” that reaffirmed my long-held belief that most politicians are either inept, unqualified, or too busy trying to STAY in office to make decisions that have positive impact on the lives of their constituents.  Take, for example, these three accounts of recent government “action” meant to solve problems that, in my mind, were more imagined than real.

In Portland, Oregon, a young man got caught taking a leak in a local reservoir.  The article didn’t say how the law was tipped off about the wayward whiz, but after he was apprehended he admitted that adding a pint of sterile fluid to an eight million gallon body of water, was probably a dumb thing to do.  Anyway, no doubt thinking ahead to their re-election campaigns, the loony legislators had the reservoir drained and refilled in the name of “public safety.”  It wouldn’t be surprising if their next move was to mandate that the reservoir’s fish population jump out of the water to relieve themselves in the nearby bushes.

In Thornton, Colorado, city politicians instituted a regulation that will no doubt end up saving thousands of lives of both motorists and pedestrians, alike.  Citing that, “We don’t want signs to be distracting, especially to motorists,” the goofy governing body officially banned barbershop poles… those colorful red, white, and blue moving displays that have marked the locations of barber shops for centuries.  In one legislative gesture, then, they not only  destroyed a distinctive cultural icon, but the only visual example that Thornton residents had, which demonstrated how a politician’s brain spins when he or she tries to think clearly.

Finally, decision makers at the Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) recently recalled a recliner because it had a screw sticking out from somewhere on its bottom.  They did so NOT because they had received any reports of people being injured by the chair’s protruding fastener, but because there was ONE report of a dog’s fur becoming entangled in the screw.  Now, whether it was the dog who ratted out the recliner by calling in a complaint to PETA, the report didn’t say.  But one thing is for sure.  Every person who watched the six o’clock news in that comfortable chair, as well as the company that manufactured it, ended up as the ones our “brainless” bureaucrats really screwed.